October 8, 2009
I think something is wrong with me. As in, I am actually going crazy or something. I am not sad, I am not crying, I am not upset. I just feel normal. I really and truly feel like he isn’t gone, he is just still deployed and will be coming home soon. Like the past three weeks were just a really horrific nightmare and are over now. Like all of this ‘grief’ and ‘loss’ stuff is really happening to someone else and I am just playing a role. I must be really nuts. But I really think I’d rather carry on this way than face it.