Love / Don’t Love

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 I read a post today by one of my sweet, dear blogger friends and it made me realize something: as a blogger, I often share very intimate things about my thoughts and feelings but yet not much about the regular ole’ me. You guys know about my worst moments, my fears and struggles, my hopes. But do you know I love chai tea and dystopian novels and hate the word ‘meal’ and the smell of rose-scented anything? I want to start sharing more of the girl behind the blog, and I’m starting today. Inspired by Chambanachik, I’ve come up with a little list of things I love and things I don’t love. The lists leaves off the obvious biggies (love God, my kiddo/family, and my friends; don’t love death, fear, or pain) leans more toward the quirky things, and is not exhaustive of everything by any means, but regardless is a little slice of the authentic person behind the screen…

A few things I love:

Nature. From growing up playing in the woods and ditches, climbing trees and building forts – to having my breath taken away the first time I saw the incomprehensible majesty of the mountains at Glacier National Park and truly understood the meaning of ‘God’s country’, I’ve been captivated by the natural world. Whether it’s breathing in the salt air at the ocean or listening to the rustling wind in the trees in the mountains, I feel so alive when I’m in tune with the rhythm of the outdoors.

Stationary. Oh how I love paper goods. I have an embarrassingly large collection of note paper, stationary, cards, writing pads, envelopes, journals, and various stationary accoutrements. I adore snail mail and believe that there is nothing quite as intimate as a handwritten letter. I don’t write as many as I wish I did, and I need to rectify that. My heart and my collection will thank me.

Being on the road. There is absolutely nothing like the feeling of being on the open road. The yellow lines flying by, music playing on the radio, the anticipation of going somewhere. I love planning it, I love doing it, I love discovering new places. And I am always unhappy when it is over. Fact is, I have a gypsy soul. I love life on the road and would travel all.the.time if I could afford it and it wouldn’t take away the stability my child deserves.

Coffee. Not much more to say about this except I heart it. I tried to give it up once or twice but, while I love a good loose-leaf tea, nothing takes the place of my morning coffee. Black with a splash of milk and a 1/2 teaspoon of coconut sugar, please.

Live music. Music makes my heart beat. Oh good grief, yes I just said that. Let’s forget the cheesiness and be serious for a minute. It really does. I’ve had a soundtrack to my life since I was 7 years old and got my first radio in my room and listened to the local country radio station while I fell asleep at night. Although my tastes have changed numerous times over the course of my life, the importance of music hasn’t. And there is no better way to feel that in my core like live music. Want to see me lose myself? Take me to a concert.

Creating things. I love to use my hands to produce something that didn’t exist before me. Whether it’s writing, building something, taking photos, cooking, or even transforming the dirty clothes pile into a freshly folded pile, there is something so so satisfying about creating. That moment when you can step back from your work and realize that you did that and it wouldn’t exist without the work of your hands is like no other.

Love. I’ll admit it. I’m a lover. Not necessarily in the romantic sense (although I am a hopeless romantic), but just in general. Having love and compassion for everyone around you can make such a difference…in your life and theirs. Everyone is going through something. Everyone needs someone, whether it’s for a smile and nod or a supportive friend or a life partner. Being kind and loving to everyone is something that makes my heart happy.

Smelly stuff. Well, good-smelling stuff. Oh I just love how scents can stimulate your other senses. Some smells can take me right back to specific times in my life, for instance the scent of cucumber-melon lotion takes me back to church camp in the seventh grade and the scent of amber makes me think of an influential time in my life back in ’07. Candles make me inspired, men’s cologne makes me weak, Mr. Bubble bath makes me snuggle my kiddo, Lush’s Olive Branch solid perfume makes me want to paint the town red, and Axe body wash makes me so sad… Regardless, I love smells.

A few things I don’t love:

Waiting. I’ll admit it. I’m impatient. It is one of my weaknesses, one of my personality flaws. I pray all the time for more patience, for more calm and more peace and more deep breaths and more ohhmmm vibes. But damn. Waiting on things, being stuck in traffic, waiting on significant life events, being stuck as a person, waiting on results, waiting waiting waiting in general…I could do without it. It’s human I guess, instant gratification and all. I just hope I’m being refined through this fire.

Pressure. I absolutely cannot stand feeling forced into anything. One way to get me to fold quickly is to make me feel like I am backed up against a wall. I grew up with a lot of pressure, intended or otherwise, and I have scars. I’ve grown and sometimes I can take that pressure and use it to produce results (such as when I procrastinate and have to produce work quickly, which is more often than I like to admit), but even then I am deeply displeased.

Lemonade. I can’t be the only one who gets that weird feeling in the back of your throat when drinking lemonade. I can’t stand that. So much so that I won’t drink it. Ick.

The heat. I know, I know. I am a born and raised Floridian, and I live here again. I should be used to it, right? Maybe I used to be, but ever since I got a taste of actual seasons and cold weather I’ve never bounced back. I just don’t like the ‘can’t-breathe, need-a-shower-even-though-I-just-got-out, even-my-bra-is-sweating’ heat of the summer. And I absolutely abhor being hot while I sleep. I love the sun, love the beach, but can we just keep it below 85 please?

Being judged. Or is it allowing myself to be affected by feeling judged? I was about to write a whole pet-peeve-schpeal about this one, but then I got hit by that whammy and it just shut me right up. Because really, no one can do it to you without you allowing it. Hmm…

Certain food textures. Okay okay, so I’m a baby sometimes. This one I could try to get over, but oh well. I can’t stand those stringy parts of bananas, the sponginess of mushrooms, excess fat on meat, the strands on celery (pretty much hate celery in general), and the hard centers of romaine lettuce. If you love me, you’ll pluck those out of my food. I’d do it for you. For real.

Cleaning. Ahhh I’m cringing admitting this one. I’m a bit of a neat freak and slightly OCD (which should be CDO, get it in order people), but to be honest I hate cleaning. I want the clean, I just don’t like the process to get there. It was SO much easier when I had a partner. The Hubs and I were perfectly on par with housecleaning, seriously we got so lucky. We both loved the end result and loved competition, so we turned it into a game. Saturdays were ‘The Game Day’, and we split that shit up and took care of business. It didn’t matter which of us won the race, because our celebration = the grill + beverages + a clean house + a happy spouse, so everyone won. I miss that and haven’t been able to make a full comeback from losing it. My house has suffered and I’m ashamed.

Being alone. This one needs its own post. I’ve learned to be content in this new life, the kiddo and I. And this is going to sound crazy, but in learning that I am content alone I have realized that I don’t like being alone…

 

So, there’s a bit about me! I intend to share more as I go. And I want to get to know you, too! Share your list (or a link to your blog post) in the comments. Happy weekend! :)

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